This was her fourth interview in as many weeks. She had this answer down.
(Quiring van Brekelenkam, c. 1663)
He often had some of his most critical insights whilst on the toilet.
(François-Léon Benouville, 1840s)
It was best that he hadn’t seen the portrait earlier, before half had been painted over.
(François-Léon Benouville, 1840s)
Secretly, she had hoped the backdated check would be voided by the bank.
(Vermeer, 1667)
The report would take hours, but he badly needed reimbursement.
(Pforr, 1809-10)
His candleholder business always thrived this time of year, thanks to his marketing skill.
(Courbet, 1849)
He was beginning to raise doubts as to whether there was actually an offer at all.
(Paolo Veronese, 1573)
Q:Meetings, meetings, meetings! It seems that all I do is go to meetings with people who are paid far more than I am, but for little purpose. Can you help me to find a way to avoid just talking about what I ought to be doing rather than actually accomplishing something?
Anonymous
We find an interesting strategy from Sir Thomas More, whose conversation and intelligence so pleased Henry VIII that he constantly requested his company. In order to avoid these annoying interruptions, he pretended to be dull and unentertaining until the king grew bored of him.
Sir Thomas More
This sacrificed his reputation for wit and his audience with the king, but it saved his time. However, shortly afterward he also skipped the coronation of Anne Boleyn as queen, setting in motion a chain of events that led to his execution.
On that note, you may find you need to go to your meetings and keep your superiors entertained, in order to keep your position.
—Shallow Sage
Q:I was recently banned from chatroulette, despite being in the 0th percentile of penis exposure for the site. How can I convince them to let me back in, or at least find a new outlet to impersonate Justin Bieber?
Anonymous
Consider the story of scholar Giordano Bruno. Exiled by the Inquisition in 1576, he found patrons throughout Europe, but always enraged them over trivial matters or was banned for his violent quarrels. He returned to Venice because he had nowhere else to go, and was burned at the stake in 1600.
Giordano Bruno
Many believe Bruno was exiled for his Copernicanism, but this was not even considered heresy until 1664. While we know of him today because of his belief in extraterrestrial life, he actually knew very little about astronomy, and his unlikability caused his downfall.
We suggest you take Bruno’s experience to heart: while you may consider your Bieber impersonations to be a capital truth, you must accept that it is your own personality that is in great need of improvement.
—Shallow Sage
The union’s position was still a bit tenuous, yet stronger than ever before.
(Spinello Aretino, 1407)
The conversation continued up at Galt’s Gulch.
(Sacchi, 1631)
He’d achieved his goal, but was terrified his story wouldn’t be believed.
(Van Der Wyden, 1448)
Near-wisdom from the ages.
Because people never change.
